Showing posts with label New American Bible. Show all posts
Showing posts with label New American Bible. Show all posts

Thursday, March 3, 2011

The Wizards at theUSCCB Update Bible - Mary Loses Her Virginity

As usual, whenever the Bishops gather a team of Catholics they've trained at their Big Tent Seminaries, they brainstorm up a turd.

Terry has the scoop HERE.

The U.S. Conference of Catholic Bishops said its 2011 translation of the Bible will omit the word "booty" from a verse and replace "virgin" with "young woman."

The bishops group, based in Washington, said the latest edition of the New American Bible, due out March 9, will be more accurate and more accessible than previous versions,

Among the changes in the new version, which was compiled by a team of 50 scholars and translators assisted by language experts, theologians and bishops, is the replacing of the word "virgin" in Isaiah 7:14 with "the young woman," explaining the original Hebrew word, almah, may or may not refer to a virgin.

We needed a new translation because English is a living language," said Richard Sklba, the retired auxiliary bishop of Milwaukee and part of the New American Bible's review and editing team.


I have a few choice words from the living language - right out of the urban dictionary:

buffoon idiot moron fool stupid imbecile dunce clown dumbass dimwit jackass oaf simpleton dork dolt ignoramus nitwit dipshit loser silly ass twit dope nincompoop joker cretin ***hole jerk dummy dumb boob ninny donkey tool wanker blockhead annoying clod goon chump prat lunkhead dunderhead.

Can't you just picture 50 of their apostates sitting around a table wondering what the word meant?

"The Bible couldn't be prophetic, could it?"

"Nah, let's remove the word virgin."

We better scrutinize it to make sure the word 'Divinity' isn't gone when referencing Christ.

Call this a hunch, but I'll bet if they took a group picture, it would be 45 women who spent three days in Woodstock and a handful of girly men.

The NAB is mandated to be used in the Liturgy, thereby excluding the Blessed Mother's virginity in the Word to the next generation of Catholics.

Lots of luck reading it to the empty pews.

I'll often quote the NAB because finding the Douay Rheims on the internet is a little more work. If you ever see me doing that again, give me a dope slap, will you?